It has long been known that…
(I didn’t have time to look it up.)

It seems of great practical and theoretical importance…
(Could be kinda interesting)

While it was not possible to answer…
(The experiment failed.)

The XYZ system was chosen as especially suitable…
(The guy in the next lab already had the setup.)

Three of the samples were chosen for study…
(We had no idea what the other ones were.)

The machine’s calibrations were uniformly excellent.
(as per the manufacturer’s sales pitch)

Standard safety measures were enforced…
(The hood fan was always on.)

Samples were handled with extreme care…
(Except the ones dropped on the floor.)

Typical results are shown…
(Our best results were…)

This chart is complex…
(The chart is unreadable, but looks impressive.)

The agreement with the predicted curve is excellent…
(After we dropped half the data.)

The results were good.
(poor)
The results were satisfactory.
(doubtful)
The results were fair.
(imaginary)
The results were as good as could be expected.
(non-existent)
The results were correct within an order of magnitude.
(not even in the ballpark)

Additional work will be required to achieve a complete understanding.
(I didn’t understand what this was, at all.)

Hopefully this will stimulate further work in the field.
(This paper’s a crock, but maybe somebody will get it right.)

Thanks to Joe Smith for his assistance in the lab,
and to John Doe for the helpful discussions.
(Joe Smith did the experiments.
John Doe explained what they meant.)